FOPO = Fear of Other People’s Opinions 

Your life isn’t yours if you always worry what others think. In the past week, I came across several examples of people worrying what others think. Such as:

• rejecting to marry someone who treated them well but didn’t fit the “image” that they thought family would approve of or praise
• Fear of getting remarried soon after a break up because did not want to “appear” desperate or codependent 
• Not studying their passion because it is not seen as prestigious enough 
• Scared of getting divorced and being labeled as a divorcee and how people will perceive them as a failure 

For many people, worrying what others think may be a developmental trauma from needing to please a primary caretaker to feel loved or cared for. So in essence we unconsciously take on this belief that what others think of me is more important than what I want or think. 

As a child, this may have felt like the case. As an adult you have the ability to rewire your brain. Many of us believe that what others think of us makes a big difference to our lives. As a result, fearing what others think has tainted and jaded our ability to accept ourselves as is.  We become unconscious prisoners to others and don’t even realize it. 

We can only become free and remove the handcuffs when we realize that what others think of us holds little weight and impact on our overall life. Some questions to jump start the process: 

-What impact does the opinion of others have on my life? 

 -What would I do differently if I weren’t concerned about what others think of me? 

-Do I believe the opinions of others are important for me to be valued?

Some People will love you, and some people will hate you, and none of it will have anything to do with you. 

Freedom comes when we stop caring about what others think of us.